What is Despair Made of?
by TakeSomethingLiterally
Summary: "Little girls, little boys, and little puns. That's all they are, either way!" Junko writes down her thoughts about her lovely classmates.


_What are little girls made of?  
What are little girls made of?  
Sugar and spice, and everything nice.  
That's what little girls are made of._

A sugary idol like Sayaka Maizono couldn't be expected to last long at that environment full of despair and disgust, full of people who were _like_ her, and not _below _her. Students who weren't clapping for her, no matter what she did – sometimes she dreamed about the crowd and her idol friends and the gray faces in the audience, and Naegi was always there at the back row because he didn't deserve to be in the front – Should she dance for them? Should she show them what an amazing idol she was? 'Talent' was the word Maizono grew up aiming for. She was talented, she could fulfill her schedule better than anyone, she could grab the knife in the kitchen, she could fool Naegi's good intents, she could pretend she was flirting with Leon Kuwata, she could stab him and get out of there and— oh. She could die heroically too.

Celestia Ludenberg spiced things up by killing not only two people, but_ fooling_ one of them to do the dirty work for her. 'Yamada-kun, save me, save me! Ishimaru-kun did horrible things with my body.' Was what she said, and since she was a fragile girl who couldn't protect herself, Yamada had to save her and get revenge for her. And Celestia would reward her prince in shining armor with a kiss – That's what you wanted, right, you useless pig? I hope you don't mind if it's the Kiss of Death. And the Queen of Liars looked at the two corpses under her feet and allowed herself to smile triumphantly before putting up her poker face once again and crying wolf. She was going to win, she always did, she was the best gambler that was, she had played out her cards perfectly, but not really, because unfortunately her prince had an ace on his sleeve. Taeko Yasuhiro, don't make me laugh. Checkmate.

Sakura Oogami was everything nice, she was a role-model. A strong girl with a soft heart, and even if she had betrayed all of them, she didn't mean it, she swore. It was an accident, her heart faltered at that one moment, because she was thinking about her family. Wasn't honor the most important thing in a wrestler? Then she was going to make things right, she was going to defeat the mastermind and get everyone out of there, she owned that to her friends. Nothing was going to stop her from freeing them. Nothing. Not even drinking that bottle of poison, or sitting on that chair, or crying for a bit before feeling her heart stopping. That _did _make things hard for Junko, but she couldn't care less. Suicide without a reason was boring, and she came to hate Sakura for a while before getting bored of that as well.

_What are little boys made of?  
What are little boys made of?  
Slime and snails, and puppy dog tails.  
That's what little boys are made of._

He didn't want to be a baseball player, Leon Kuwata wanted to be a musician, what a waste of talent; nothing more than slime. And hey, maybe that idol girl could help and give him some hints. Maybe they could even become friends, she was cute enough. Is that a letter? What a wonderful day! They were bound to become close friends, he was sure, Maizono looked like a really good person – an idol like her needs to be emotionally balanced to endure the harsh world of the entertainment industry after all. Leon tried to cry after stabbing her, but all he could do was smile nervously. 'I'm alive!'.

Mondo Oowada was a snail, he wasn't fast at all. His motorcycle didn't stop his brother from getting killed, it didn't stop him from lying to everyone, it didn't stop him from murdering an innocent girl. 'I'm a boy, Oowada-kun. And you are so strong. I wish to become like you!'. No you don't, no you don't, no you don't, I'm not strong. Or am I? Stronger than you, obviously, and maybe stronger than Ishimaru; stronger than my brother. I've always been stronger than my brother, I'm the strongest of them all! Not strong enough to keep a straight face in front of all of his friends after he was accused of murder. He just accepted his fate, there was no way he could live with himself anyway. A leader? Yeah, right. He was lower than scum.

And then there was puppy boy. Naegi Makoto, so full of hope, wagging his tail here and there, trying to convince everyone that rescue was coming, that they'd get out of there, even though he was the responsible for lots of deaths too. Accusing your friends of murder, Naegi-kun? That's low. That's not what a good puppy boy does. Should you even be in this school? Super High School Level Good Luck, what a boring title. Or maybe it was the best title, because you are wrong, and you are about to get killed. Oh, if just I was able to feel such despair! I wish I was in your place, Naegi-kun, I really did. Death is the ultimate of despairs, and just hearing those thumps getting louder and louder must be driving you crazy. I'm so jealous, so, so jealous of you right no— Oh, the computer is back. Goddamn hacker.

* * *

_"Leon Kuwata's decisions in life are really hitting the target! Hang in there, Kuwata-kun!_

_We were shocked at the revelation of Mondo Oowada's death, Sir and Mrs. Oowada._

_Taeko Yasuhiro-san was all fired up about her latest win. She burned the competition!_

_Sakura Oogami's muscles are to die for. If you keep still, you might avoid her stone-cold punches."_

"Puns are truly the highest form of entertainment, don't you think, Onee-chan?" Junko sighed happily as she closed her notebook and looked up at her twin's cold cadaver sitting in a chair in front of her.

She then grabbed the candle that was illuminating the room and puffed it out.

"Goodnight. Sleep tight."


End file.
